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Ways to Manage Anger

  • Writer: Justin Toh
    Justin Toh
  • Mar 22, 2024
  • 3 min read

Updated: Jan 10

Close-up of a person wearing a gray sweater clenching fists. One hand has a gold ring. The mood is tense and focused.

Been feeling angry often, and thought you could benefit from a few pointers on anger management?


Anger is a natural, though often unwanted, emotion that can cause harm to our relationships, professional life, and personal wellbeing if not managed properly. Whether it stems from stress, frustration, or injustice, finding effective ways to deal with anger is crucial for maintaining mental and emotional health. Here are several strategies that can help you manage anger more effectively.


Understanding Anger

Before managing anger, it’s important to understand it. Anger is a response to perceived threats and can range from mild irritation to intense rage. It affects us both physically and emotionally, preparing our bodies to ‘fight or flee’. Recognizing the signs of anger early can help in addressing it before it escalates.


1. Identify the Triggers

Understanding what triggers your anger is the first step towards managing it. Keep a journal to note when you get angry and what the circumstances were. Over time, patterns will emerge, helping you anticipate and prepare for situations that might provoke anger.


2. Practice Deep Breathing

Deep breathing is a powerful tool for calming the nervous system and reducing anger. When you feel anger rising, take slow, deep breaths from your diaphragm. Count to four as you inhale, hold for a second, and then count to four as you exhale. Repeat until you feel calmer.



3. Use Time-Outs

Giving yourself a break during heated moments can prevent your anger from escalating. If you feel your temper rising, excuse yourself from the situation if possible and take a few minutes to collect your thoughts and calm down.


4. Exercise Regularly

Physical activity can help reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. When you exercise, your body releases endorphins, which are hormones that improve your mood. Regular exercise, whether it’s a brisk walk, a run, or yoga, can keep anger in check.


5. Express Anger Appropriately

Once calm, express your anger in an assertive but non-confrontational way. Clearly and directly communicate your concerns and needs without hurting others or trying to control them. If you feel that you can’t really control yourself, then perhaps it is best to refrain from speaking or expressing yourself – for the time being.


Person jogging on a sunny day in a park, wearing bright pink shoes and black leggings. Green trees and grass in the background.

6. Seek Solutions

Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand. Ask yourself what you can do about the source of your anger. Is there a compromise? Can the issue be looked at differently? Focusing on solutions rather than stewing in your anger is more constructive.


7. Use Humor

Finding the humor in a situation can help defuse anger. Try to see the irony or absurdity in what’s making you angry. However, avoid sarcasm; it can hurt feelings and make things worse.


8. Practice Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a powerful tool. Holding onto anger and resentment can hurt you more than the person who caused your anger. By forgiving, you can free yourself from the control of negative emotions.


Two people are sitting closely, holding hands with turquoise nail polish. One wears a gray sweater and pants, creating a comforting mood indoors.

9. Seek Professional Help

If your anger seems out of control, causing you to do things you regret or hurting those around you, seeking the help of a counselor or psychologist can be beneficial. Therapy can provide insights into your anger and help develop strategies for managing it.

Managing anger is not about never feeling angry but about understanding your anger and finding healthy ways to express and deal with it. By incorporating these strategies into your life, you can improve your emotional health and strengthen your relationships. Remember, managing anger is a skill that requires practice and patience, but with time and effort, it can be achieved.

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